|But it wasn't a rock. It was a rock LOBSTER!
||[Nov. 20th, 2005|01:55 am]
Ital Congo Trinity Lion Hi-Power Imperial Tuffhead
So I'm a bit drunk and there's no one to talk to, so I just read Tims
last journal and I've decided I'm going to try to do the same thing he
did and type without thinking. Let us begin ..
OK, so I'm sitting here and I'm reminded of the time I engineered an
album by the The Beatles. This was in 1963. We (we being myself and
Wolverine) kidnapped them in an experimental hovercraft off the coast
of Brazil and took them to the Carribiean. It was actually Scabb
Island, which was a little known island untill it was thrust into the
spotlight in the hugely popular game Monkey Island 2: LeChucks Revenge,
published by LucasArts some years ago. Anyway, we took them to Scabb
Island and put them in a cave. It was a nice cave, it had candles and
vinyl flooring. The kind of vinyl faux leather couches are made of. I
used the word "faux" instead of "fake" because it's more wanky
sounding, like that cunt on television that said "reâl politique" one
time instead of just saying "real politics". So we left them in the
cave and went to get some basketballs from a bunch of Korean
breakdancers. Actually, I was watching this Korean action film and I
noticed the Korean language sounds to me like a cross between Japanese
and Chinese, which makes sense because they're wedged between China and
Japan. It was fucking cool, that shit is mad interesting. To me. Shit.
Anyway, these Korean breakdancers, there was this one guy called Ryu
Ssanyong, and he tried to do do a scorpion freeze out of a windmill,
but he got hurt and just ended up doing a king tut instead. We cheered
anyway and then asked if he had any basketballs. He was like "Shibural
jot kat'un nigimi jot manhan ddong mul eh t'wigyo jukil ship
sekia!!1!!1!". Trust me, that's pretty bad. So I was like "'k". I
wanted to lamp him but my mate (Wolverine) bit him and gave him
Syphillus so that was nice. After Ryu Ssanyong died his friend gave us
a cassette, one of those old Maxell ones, black with a white label with
blue stuff up the top. "Egads!" I said. Because I realised I needed to
cut my toenails. So I put on this tape in my friends (Wolverines) boom
box that he'd been carrying the whole time, and it was Metalton music.
Metalton is shit hot. It's an extrodinary fusion of Scandinavian Black
Metal and traditional Korean folk music, or Pansori, weaving rich
cultural tappestries and blurring pre-concieved Western notions of the
Lydian Augmentend Scale. I did Bogle-Bogle. Wolverine did the Wop and
the Running Man. O RLY? Afer that we went to get some chicken at the
market, we caught a ferry there because it was on the other side of a
lake made out of lava. We go to the market and my friend (Wolverine)
commented on the smell. It smelled like pancakes and coffee.
In the end The Beatles died but we made new ones out of pinecones and
I'll never forget that horse.